Guru

Guru's e-mail inbox regularly breaches its storage limit thanks to the hundreds of human resources-related press releases he receives every day.

Guru does his bit for the e-environment by filing them all in his "recycling bin".

Why don't public relations departments spend their PR budgets more wisely? Like on expensive gifts, swanky lunches and fully catered overseas junkets for journalists. If only they knew how easy it is to bribe us members of The Fourth Estate...

On the subject of bribery, one press release made it through Guru's spam filter (delete button) thanks to its intriguing headline: "Two thirds of workers reveal passwords for chocolate and a pretty smile."

Guru once knew a girl who would reveal all for a chocolate and a winning smile. She's now fathered eight children by six different men. But that's another story.

Infosecurity Europe carried out a survey of 300 office workers passing through London train stations to see how security savvy they were.

Some 64% gave up their passwords for what Infosecurity grandly calls "social engineering techniques" - ie a free Mars Bar and a bit of flirting from "the attractive researcher".

But Guru can't help but wonder whether Infosecurity has underestimated the wily ways of the London commuter - who have probably all "given up" fake passwords in exchange for their prize.

Attractive researcher: "Hello sir, I was just wondering - would you tell me your computer password in exchange for this bar of chocolate?"

Guru: "Why yes, young lady. It's URA5UCK3R. Thanks for the Mars Bar."