Archive | July, 2007

Car Laptop Phone

When did phones and laptops become benefits?

An interesting question today from Disciple Stuart on the issue of new employee benefits packages. Stuart asks: I refer to a number of recent human resources job advertisements in Personnel Today. Is it now a trend to offer as part of the benefits package for an area HR manager: a car, a laptop and a […]
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LaneyMax.jpg

MMA champ invites Guru to her ‘melee’

Guru’s extraordinary MySpace experience continues to amaze and amuse in equal measure. You can become Guru’s virtual friend if you like what you see on Guru’s MySpace home page. So far Guru has ‘achieved’ 110 friends. Many are human resources professionals. Others are a bit more random – even bordering on the famous. But Guru’s […]
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Flipper Stillettos

Gloucester flood victims retain sense of style

These High Tide Heels are apparently what the fashion-conscious ladies of Gloucestershire are wearing these days, following weeks of heavy rainfall and flooding:
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Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

Put down your Harry Potter book and grow up

Guru can just about bear Harry Potter-mania among pre-teens. He can vaguely accept kids falling for JK Rowling and publisher Bloomsbury‘s marketing hype about the new book Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. After all, kids aren’t reading enough these days, what with the competing demands of the Playstation 3, Xbox, Nintendo Wii, alcopops, childhood […]
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Men and women

Concerned husband acts to halt wife’s spending

For every husband who worries about his wife’s absurd ability to spend exorbitant amounts of money, here is some inspiration from a fellow shopping widower. This extraordinary letter (supposedly from the K-mart store in Reno, Nevada) details the activities of a man driven to extreme measures to get his wife banned from her favourite shop. […]
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Simpsons Guru

Create your own Simpsons character

Friday (27 July) sees the long-awaited launch of The Simpsons Movie. The marketing hype is reaching a crescendo. Guru has already told you about the transformation of several 7-Eleven stores into Kwik-E-Marts. Well now, thanks to fellow blogger Cheezhead, Guru has discovered that you can create your very own Simpsons character (or avatar, as it’s […]
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flooding

Water water everywhere, but not a drop to drink

More news on the current wet weather and devastating floods. Disciple Bob informs Guru that he arrived at his office the other day to find a huge sign in reception announcing that, due to flooding, the local water authority could not guarantee that the building’s drinking water was sanitary. Employees were advised not to drink […]
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Smirting

Flood crisis and smoking ban lead to ‘smirting’

What dreary wet weather we are suffering at the moment! The current flood crisis is not only damaging property, but also important social lives. Guru had grand plans the other evening, having received a coveted invitation for one of the social events of the year – an exclusive garden party in West London. But on […]
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arm bandage

Injury denials stump Guru at home of cricket

Guru was fortunate enough to attend the opening day of the England vs India cricket Test Match at Lords last week. He was, naturally, not sitting among the plebs, but was stationed in a corporate hospitality box with other important people. Despite the distractions of free food, booze and dazzling strokeplay, Guru kept his ears […]
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worklifebalance.jpg

Putting the ‘work’ into work/life balance

For those of you who believe employees have too much life in their work/life balance, disciple Becks offers the following amendments to the terms and conditions of the contract of employment: FROM THE HUMAN RESOURCES DEPARTMENT Effective Immediately… SICK DAYS: We will no longer accept a doctor’s statement as proof of sickness. If you are […]
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