September 10, 2007
Guru had the intense displeasure of wasting some of his valuable time in the company of an extremely dull HR director recently (sorry folks, no names).
Not only was he boring, but he loved the sound of his own voice and plainly believed that Guru was fascinated by every bigoted and plainly wrong opinion he so willingly shared about human resources, the world of work and society in general.
How do such people go through their lives unscathed and rise to positions of great influence and seniority? Who is thinking 'these guys will be good for our organisation' and promoting the idiots?
Now Guru has learned enough social niceties down the years (and spent enough time in the company of bores) to know how to handle these situations without causing offence to said dim-wits.
But his recent, gruelling experience with Mr Tedious has forced a change of heart. From this moment on, Guru is launching his own personal campaign to 'Ditch the Dullard'.
Don't put up with them any more.
In future, if Guru finds himself stuck with a boring ignoramus, he is simply going to extricate himself from the situation. Walk away, create an excuse or, if the worst comes to the worst, simply comfront them with their dullness:
I'm sorry - yours is quite the most excruciatingly bad acquaintance I have ever had the misfortune to make. I simply cannot bear to listen to any more of you arrogant, inane ramblings. I have better things to do with my life. Goodbye.
Or words to that effect.
Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind. Guru's 'Ditch the Dullard' campaign is actually a kind of social service. Many of these crashing bores will have no idea that their people skills are so lacking. It could actually benefit them in the long term to be told so candidly that they are uninteresting, since it will give them a chance to do something about it.
If you prefer the non-confrontational approach, Guru is also working on an invention to help you 'Ditch the Dullard'.
He is developing a discreet device that you can put in you pocket or conceal elsewhere about your person. It will feature a button which, when pressed, will activate at full volume the ring tone on your own mobile phone. This will then allow you to say to your unwelcome companion:
I'm terribly sorry. That's an urgent call I've been expecting, and I really must take it.
Then wander off into a quiet private space - pretending all the time to be engaged in an important conversation - before getting the hell out of there and 'Ditching the Dullard'.
Sign up to Guru's 'Ditch the Dullard' campaign before these losers spoil life for the rest of us.
Comments (1)
Why not give him (if it was an 'Her' she woudn't be dull or a Director) your copy of 'The Watchtower- a guide to our Lord Jehova' (assuming you've read it) and ask him for his view on the afterlife... he should leave you.
Posted by Disciple Neil | September 20, 2007 2:28 PM
Posted on September 20, 2007 14:28