December 10, 2007
A woman whispering in conspiratorial tones into her phone at work would seem to Guru as much a part of everyday office life a member of the female species turning down sugar in her tea because she’s on a diet and then buying a Kit Kat.
So it is amazing to think that one employee’s suspicions over a snatched conversation at work led to the unravelling of a five-year plot involving a faked death, an insurance scam and a new life in central America.
According to the Daily Mail – which has been all over this story like a stray dog that wandered through a front door and found an unguarded Christmas dinner – the ‘Canoe two’ were rumbled by one of Anne Darwin’s co-workers.
It seems that Anne, not sure that posing with her ‘dead’ husband for a dated photo on the internet was careless enough, chose to talk to him while at her desk at a County Durham doctor’s surgery.
Of course, she would lower her voice, and use terms such as “yes you are all booked in for 3:40pm next Wednesday, we will need a blood test and a one-way ticket to Panama, darling.” But, incredibly, she was still found out.
So the sleuth-like co-worker alerted the police, the Old Bill got on the trail towards Panama City and poor old Canoe Man John Darwin realised the game was up. He decided his only salvation was to return to England, ruffle his hair up and wander into a northern England police station pretending he had lost his memory. Allegedly.
Well, Guru wonders what mysteries he could have solved if he had kept his eyes and ears open in the office for all those years.
Perhaps Bazza and Steve’s late Monday arrivals weren’t down to hangovers but some kind of international terrorism missions. Maybe Cindy wasn’t blind at all. And he always wondered why the girls went to the toilets in pairs…
