Archive | February, 2008
29 February: as strange as ever
Happy Leap Day, disciples. Have any of you been down on bended knee to your commitment-phobe boyfriends? How about you, ladies?
Traditionally, of course, 29 February was seen as a day beyond English law, one where anything goes and the… continue
Drumming up support
Drummers, Guru has long suspected, are the leaders of a superior race, living quietly(ish) among us, waiting for their moment to take over the world.
Surely Ringo Starr knew something we didn’t as he 4/4 beat his way into human… continue
Act of God proves Guru hotline to Almighty
Guru’s mystical powers know no bounds, it seems.
No sooner had he speculated on seriously unlikely things that could happen to a man locked in a bank up north, than God Almighty takes an interest to prove Mr Whitmarsh’s concerns… continue
Banking on honest Brits to refrain from arson
News that a man and his dog getting locked into a branch of HSBC bank failed to set alarm bells ringing at the global finance giant ought to be a bit of a concern for anyone who’s money is tied… continue
Hair-brained Unison makes public gaffe
Yesterday’s CV writers, of course, appear unaware of spellcheckers, but most people involved in publishing use it wisely, taking full advantage of Microsoft’s red squiggles beneath misspelt (or should that be miss-spelled?) words.
This by no means puts a complete… continue
Busty reminder of need for CV rigour
Being a fan of both charismatic curriculum vitae and ample shirt potatoes, Guru can not see the problem with a job candidate putting down their contact email address as bigboobs@yahoo.com.
However, it seems that 63% of employers have seen inappropriate… continue
Military rule
Finally some common sense and a logical idea to exterminate two very troublesome birds with one perfectly aimed, nuclear-tipped stone.
The feathered enemies in question are lack of discipline among today’s youngsters, and problems readjusting to civilian life for those… continue
Aural assault leave lugholes languishing
As befits one with more aural capacity than most, on account of having less follicle matter surrounding his lugholes (see side view above), Guru likes to keep his ear to the ground, as it were, to pick up juicy bits… continue
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