February 5, 2008
Guru spluttered on his black forest gateaux this afternoon when he saw that he had an e-mail from a company called BJ Services. Quickly pressing the Escape Key and shuffling to cover his screen from Mrs Guru, he was sure that he had given his anonymous Hotmail address for such 'personal' correspondence.
Nethertheless, here was some personnel correspondence, gushing to explain that BJ Services had opened an employee development centre in Aberdeen.
The technical detail was outragous. Apparently BJ Services wants to "enhance its range of training services and development resources for employees in BJ Process and Pipeline Services." Guru had to read on.
The new 'facility' will provide multiple... er... classrooms with a - wait for it - maximum head-count of 12.
A shameless training manager who shall not be named said: “To provide additional hands-on equipment training we established a training area in the yard that features a classroom, pipe-loop and open space to run operational equipment.”
“The primary advantage of operating a self-contained training centre is that it makes it possible for the company to focus on what’s important: training BJ employees to offer the safest, most competent service to its customers,” he added.
“There’s nothing to interfere with our ability to concentrate all of our attention on the task at hand.”
Guru was about to head off for a lie down when he read the final line, explaining that BJ Services was a leading provider of pressure pumping and related oilfield services to the petroleum industry. Well what else could it have been?
