Archive | March, 2008

Office Olympics 2: rowing

Watching another compelling Boat Race at the weekend reminded Guru of some fun to be had in the office on one of the quieter days in his busy schedule. It’s a little less energetic than last month’s hurdles but nevertheless, worth the watch…
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Eyes wide shut

Guru woke with a start the other afternoon when his wind-up wireless crackled with the news that six in 10 people have fallen asleep at work. It then went into a review of the England football team’s performance in Paris, during which it seemed all 11 players dozed into a terminal slumber, but it turns […]
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Spurious survey names names

Disciple Steve, has alerted Guru to the benefits of being called Steve, being from the South East and being a ‘capricorn’. Apparently a spurious survey by recruitment firm Reed found that uncontrary to popular belief, people who live in the most affluent part of the country command the highest salaries. Shockingly, its survey also confirmed […]
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Teachers go to war against military might

Teachers, dontyajusluvem? Guru certainly does – especially the well-equipped variety that like to hand out extra-curricular activities (but that’s another story) – and keeps a key eye on their annual get together at the National Union of Teachers conference. Considering strike action for the first time in the last 10 minutes, the NUT conference always […]
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Spirit of Easter soiled by unholy row

Following a weekend in which the world’s top clown George W highlighted the true meaning of Easter by embracing a great big rabbit, Guru notes that the misguided influence of the church over our daily lives has, nonetheless, reached epic – not to say epidemic (at least in Africa) – proportions.
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‘Olympic torture’ ignites worker debate

Guru has been away. And once again the Olympics has demonstrated just how small the world is by bringing a level playing field to all corners of the… erm… globe _ although, admittedly, from a scientific and mathematical perspective, this is clearly impossible outside the realms of quantum physics. Returning from a ‘fact-finding’ mission to […]
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The cringe of coaching

What with poet laureate Andrew Motion no doubt pre-occupied penning an ode to Prince Harry’s exploits in Afghanistan* – and Philip Larkin, Lord Byron and Pam Ayres unavailable, it fell to David Adams to write the end of show poem for the 2008 Association for Coaching Conference. This free form effort showed scant regard for […]
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W**k from Home Day

Producers of daytime chav-baiting TV programme the Jeremy Kyle show, photographers on weekly breasts-and-bums mag Nuts, and whoever is behind that mysterious everyone-talking-about-nothing website Facebook are sure to be circling Thursday 15 May in huge red ink on their wall calendars. They will be planning plenty of action that day to capture hugely inflated audiences […]
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Tupperware the Ides of March

Fat people have fallen off the radar of late – probably as a result of reaching tipping point due to eating too many bourbon creams. However, as Guru dunked his 15th custard cream in his afternoon tea, he was reminded that, despite the National Audit Office’s insistence that tubsters are a burden on the state […]
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Hot data with geeks bearing giftpacks

The Witch of ID (as opposed to the Wizard of Id), old Super Smith herself, must be heartened by the news that the military might of the UK is unable to keep track of its own ID cards. Apparently, 11,000 have gone missing in the past two years, which is a fair chunk of military […]
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