April 1, 2008
After all the finger pointing and tongue wagging - or should that be the other way round? - Guru believes he may have uncovered the real culprits behind the Terminal 5 fiasco (it was officially upgraded from a farce at 3:15pm on Tuesday 1 April).
It seems that the poor baggage system at the new Heathrow hub of British Airways became overwhelmed, not because of staff training or technology failings, but because of the excessively wired state of passengers using it.
The true condition of the wannabe flying public that day became apparent when the Sun told the story of businesswoman Terri Patsalides, who was hit with a £360,000 bill for four cappuccinos at a Terminal 5 coffee bar.
Well, the price, if anything, is relatively cheap compared with the coffee outlets Guru frequents in London town. But what on earth was Patsalides thinking, guzzling down four strong Italian coffees before a flight? Yours Truly remembers the day when plane passengers would pack sleeping pills and earplugs for the red-eye to New York - now they are furiously mainlining caffeine. Even worse - according to the Sun, she "downed" them.
So pity the poor baggage system as thousands of sweating, fidgeting business travellers coarse towards it with a demented look in their eyes, thrusting their Pro Plus-filled suitcases at it like people possessed. It is no wonder they caused its collapse.
Guru suggests it is time everyone calmed down on the coffee front. Perhaps HR could start handing out herbal teas to those embarking on long journeys, or at least encourage them to stick to hand luggage.
