The Work Clinic

Jo Causon:
Office relationships are always tricky to handle, but that doesn’t mean to say impossible. Asking the question, though, is a strong sign that you have the ability and maturity to prevent your new relationship from becoming a problem at work.

In most cases, the issue you’re likely to face is suspicion. Colleagues can become cautious with what they say in your presence and how they treat you, especially if they fear that you will benefit from favouritism. So the first thing to do is demonstrate that your relationship will not be used to your advantage.

You may also find that gossip about you quickly spreads around the office. Don’t rise to the bait. You’re best bet is to ignore the chatter. Show that comments won’t affect you and anyone engaging in this sort of banter will quickly grow bored.

Above all, don’t let your relationship impact on your work. And don’t let work impact on your relationship. Achieving a balance between work and home life is something we all strive to do. It’s important to make sure your colleagues realise that you are not merging the two. Yet it is also important that you have the freedom to enjoy your career and your personal life.

Steve Miller:
Romance at work is bad for corporate health. I can't deny there have been times in my career, when I lived a singleton's life, that some nice looking guy of my own sexual persuasion caught my eye and and I dreamt of asking him out on a date. But I recognised that intimate relationships in the workplace can create a number of problems and dent corporate health.

My own view on this is that we should completely avoid intimate relationships with colleagues, the boss and most definitely our staff. Of course sometimes emotions take over and love just happens. As sweet as this may be it is my own view that staff in relationships, particularly in senior roles, should not be permitted to work closely together. I would even go to the extreme of saying there are cases of "chose your job or your lover".

Initiate relationships can create real challenges for business such as conflict and awkwardness in a team, tiffs in front of customers and colleagues, confidentiality problems, and tensions when the relationship breaks down. If you find yourself falling for someone you work closely with, then think twice. Recognise what dangers it may bring if you initiate that first public date and the boss consequently sits you down to explain a choice has to be made.

Maybe single life is best after all?

Relationship expert Brenda Della Casa's view and more on office relationships