This week's guru

Teatime dunking habits really take the biscuit

Guru never knew the humble biscuit was such an integral part of the UK's collective business psyche. Don't any of you get fed?

The response to Guru's piece linking biscuit preference to personality types and behaviour is now getting out of hand. Some of the e-mails have verged on the weird (that's weird sick, not weird unusual).

One of the most popular methods of biscuit consumption appears to involve using your biscuit like a straw to suck up your preferred hot beverage.

Guru has every sympathy for anyone who has to sit in a meeting with HR manager Sarah Delaney and her workmates. "Myself and my colleagues have to report that 'Twixels' (miniature Twix) are the best for the tea sucking method, and can be a bit more discreet that a full size Twix in a meeting," reveals Sarah.

Support services manager Sue Hopwood's method of eating her favourite biscuit, the Jammy Dodger, might also be frowned upon at the board table. "I always eat them by separating the two halves, eating the boring bit quickly to get it out of the way, and then lick the half most of the yummy stuff is stuck to," she admits.

There were also numerous responses from people hazarding a guess over management guru Meredith Belbin's favourite biscuit.

Retail training manager Paul Thorp believes Belbin's top biscuit would be a digestive, "because it's what you have to do to understand his Team Role Inventory!"

Workforce development specialist Elaine McGladdery, thinks Belbin's favourite would have to be the Family Circle biscuit assortment, "as one single biscuit type would not be as successful a coffee break experience as a variety of complimentary flavours, textures and properties".

And now for my next witness - God

Guru was intrigued to read about the case of a former call centre worker from Monmouth, South Wales, Julian Evans who was given a two-year community rehabilitation order by Merthyr Tydfil Crown Court after giving a false character reference to a judge.

While Guru is sure false references are widespread, even he had to admire Mr Evans' extravagant claim that the Pope was willing to attest to the Welshman's good character. Obviously the judge found this claim 'holy' unacceptable and ordered Mr Evans to stop 'pontificating'.

Any do