The quality of UK management is being lambasted from all sides at the
moment, and it seems there’s a bit of David Brent in us all.
However, the star of hit TV show The Office pales in comparison with real-life
managers if our readers are to be believed.
Last week we published some of the most baffling management styles in the
UK, and asked for your ideas on the characters who make the working day a
living nightmare.
Here are some of the best (or worst) responses, with contributors’ names
removed to protect their careers.
Manipulative Sycophantic Viperous Tantrum
Will flatter and fawn to get their way. If that fails, they give a venomous
bite, stamp their feet and stick out the bottom lip.
Pram-style Management
Rides along happily while everyone else does the hard work to move the
business forward. The toys will be thrown from the pram (or shouts, slams doors
and sulks) if anyone dares to say ‘no’.
King Canute Management
Uses various intimidation tactics and is astounded when staff say no. Their
distinctive bulging eyes are often popping out of the skull and are
complimented by bulging veins in the temples. Confused by non-compliance or
differing views.
The Shatner
Modelled on the captain of the Star Ship Enterprise in epic 1970s TV series
Star Trek. In times of peril they proclaim: "Make it so, number one",
and the hapless junior just presses a few buttons, and it happens. Many
managers think it really is that easy, so just who is living in fantasy land?
The faker
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Pretends to know what’s going on, but may as well be on Mars. When stumped
by a lack of knowledge they will simply talk more loudly, and baffle staff with
meaningless management speak. Will always be seen in the right places, and just
in time to take the credit for your work.
By Ross Wigham
