Medieval weirdo or HR goddess?

A recent survey showed eight in 10 employers say the ‘other interests’ listed on CVs influence recruitment decisions.

Guru has received a letter from Sharron Shulver, HR officer at UK Shared Services & Silicones, who is concerned her private penchants might put her in job jeopardy:

Dear Guru,

I am a part-qualified HR officer, working in HR for seven years. I am also a member of Regia Anglorum, an early medieval re-enactment society. There are a quarter of a million re-enactors in the UK. Are we all unemployable? Should I remove it from my CV? It is a hobby that has taken me as far a field as Poland, and has also got me on the telly. Should I just accept that I’m a weirdo with no future in HR, or should I be glad my hobby is fun?

Guru thinks that any employer unwise enough to refuse to hire someone, who may well own an extensive collection of medieval weaponry, shouldn’t be recruiting in the first place. Changing your middle name to Boudica can only help your career progression.

Toffs can expect good thrashing Down Under

Ensuring your staff have the right skills for the job is something every employer should do. Coupled with this is the need to be clear what cultural variations are impacting on your business.

With these basics in mind, Guru applauds the business acumen of Australian brothels. As the Rugby World Cup gears up in Oz, gentlemen’s retreats are calling in extra fetishists to cater for the needs of posh English fans.

Robbie Swan, a spokesman for The Eros Association, Australia’s adult entertainment industry, told the BBC: “The upper classes in England – we know they like spanking.”

Not only does this provide a model example of companies recruiting to fit the business environment and close skills gaps, but it will also offer hope to those in the UK who are not England rugby fans. Guru’s Celtic comrades can now relax in the knowledge that even if the team wins on the pitch, the English seem likely to take a beating off it.

Unbelievable truth hits Danish church

A Danish vicar who admitted to not believing in God has been given his job back after he apologised for his comments.

Danish priest Thorkild Grosboll confessed to thinking that God was no more real than Robin Hood. He also stated that he did not believe in resurrection or eternal life.

At this point, Guru started to wonder if the Church’s recruitment process needed to be more rigorous.

Grosboll’s statements drew criticism from the Danish church, media and the political community, and he was dismissed form his position. However, bishop Lise-Lotte Rebel later confirmed the priest’s suspension had been annulled after the disbelieving vicar apologised.

The Danish media is now questioning the priest’s credibility and the bishop’s right to decide whether the vicar’s faith is strong enough.

Where better to plan the perfect murder?

A recent survey showed that UK workers would avoid meetings if they could. But, should the unlucky worker find him or herself unwittingly caught up in a meeting situation, they have other outlets.

ACT Teleconferencing has researched what UK workers do when faced with a boring meeting, and has discovered the ‘depth of unspoken loathing that people have for managers who chair dull meetings’.

Guru took time out in a meeting to transcribe the following list from the survey:

– 22 per cent of people make lists

– 18 per cent think about television, sport, shopping, sex or food

– 7 per cent pass notes to colleagues containing remarks of a sarcastic or suggestive nature

– 2 per cent plan spending a lottery win or the murder of their spouse, partner or line manager

– 40 per cent doodle.

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