Mad disciple cannot name day of week

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Disciple Fleur contacted Guru with some well-rounded praise of his penmanship. As we all know, flattery will get you everywhere, so Guru has decided to waive his exorbitant consultancy fees to help Fleur with a rather taxing problem.

To put it all in context, this is how her e-mail went (well, it may have been edited slightly):

Dear Guru,
Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.
Your humble disciple,
Fleur – well, as it’s Posh Thursday here today, ‘Lady Sharon of Basildon’.
[We have] Army Monday, French Tuesday – we’re all mad! We are stuck for Wednesday and Friday, though – can you help?

So there we have it – the greatest problem facing modern HR: what theme to choose for Wednesday and Friday in the office. To be honest, Guru is a bit of a traditionalist when it comes to this sort of thing. Combine this with the fact that more needs to be done to persuade staff to get involved in sport and get fit there can be only one answer: Bear-Baiting Wednesday and Cock-Fighting Friday. Simple when you think about it.