‘What on Earth did we start?’ the people of Nazareth 2,000 years ago would have pondered, with furrowed brows, had they had the ability to stare into a crystal ball at the 21st century’s annual tizz over Christmas.
While every other function of the economy goes into overdrive trying to sell things, cover absences, finish projects, feed people and make elaborate plans, HR appears to rub its hands together and plot how to throw its shade: don’t get frisky at the office party, don’t get drunk and be indiscrete, don’t get a second job to pay for the stuff you’ve bought … and
Personnel Today’s favourite this year, don’t spend more than £150 per head on staff because employees may have to pay a taxable benefit in kind on the outlay. There go our plans for an all-expenses-paid Christmas skiing trip to Val d’Isère.
Many of us will be stumped by this. Who’d have thought it? But through a thicket of email holly has charged specialist tax firm Forbes Dawson which warns: “Under employment tax legislation, staff entertainment is only exempt from tax if the employer pays no more than £150 per person – or an average of £150 to a group of employees if it is impossible to work out the cost per head – each year, including transport.”
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That guy is banned!
But Andrew Marr (not that Andrew Marr), managing partner at Forbes Dawson, hasn’t entirely forgotten about the Christmas spirit.
He tells us: “For the exemption to apply, it is also necessary that all employees be invited. Therefore, banning the guy who threw up on the boss’s wife last year could technically have costly tax consequences.”
He continues: “If the benefit is taxable, it must be included on the employee’s end-of-year P11D form. They will pay tax on the benefit at their marginal rate (up to 45%). The company will also pay 13.8% Class 1A National Insurance.” This isn’t good news for the boss’s wife.
Forbes Dawson recommends allowing staff to invite guests to the party to spread the average cost across a greater number of people.
Christmas music – no not that song
Let’s turn the music up and drown out all this tax noise. Ah, not so fast: a new study by CSGOLuck has revealed the Christmas tracks that hamper productivity. God forbid!
Here comes the “science”. Spotify research has found that music between 50 and 80 beats per minute puts your brain into an “alpha state,” rendering you more relaxed, focused and receptive. But tunes with more beats per minute become distracting as the brain works harder to process the sound.
So apparently the most distracting Christmas songs to play at work are Last Christmas by Ariana Grande (206 BPM), The Happiest Christmas Tree by Nat King Cole (205 BPM), It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year by Andy Williams (201 BPM) and once again Ariana Grande (191 BPM) with Santa Tell Me.
Conversely, Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree by Brenda Lee (67 BPM) is considered the best for productivity with the Pogues’ Fairytale of New York also in the mix.
Presents – no not that gift
OK, music will have to be carefully monitored and gatherings should be run past the accountants. Surely we can buy each other gifts – oh. Skillcast has been in touch to tell us: “The line between bribery and goodwill can be blurred when sending Christmas gifts to your clients. If your business is guilty of bribery, the penalty could range from unlimited fines to a 10-year prison sentence, so you want to make sure it’s within the law.” And you won’t be able to listen to Ariana Grande or Andy Williams in your cell.
Secret Santa – definitely not that gift
At least there’s Secret Santa to enjoy. Sorry… David Rice from People Managing People says we should think twice about our chosen gifts, “especially if they want to keep their job in the New Year”.
He says, as bleakly as mid-winter itself: “While Secret Santa is a light-hearted office tradition that is meant to just be a bit of fun, it can quickly turn sour if employees and HR teams aren’t careful.
“There are gifts that could result in employees receiving a warning or even losing their job if they aren’t extra careful,” he says.
Rice offers tips on how HR teams can keep the tradition “under control” but I’m not going to share them on word count grounds. However, I will share the experience that has so shocked Rice into his issuing his plea for caution.
He says: “I heard of one female employee who gifted a male colleague a Borat thong and it was then suggested that he should wear it. This resulted in a grievance over sexual misconduct.”
Happy Christmas.
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