The impact of grief can be debilitating, and can also profoundly affect people’s performance at work. With new rights to bereavement leave promised under the Labour government, now is a good time for employers to ensure their current provisions are fit for purpose, says Kavitha Sivasubramaniam
While many people will now be counting down the days until Christmas, for those who’ve lost a loved one the arrival of the festive season can be a difficult time, when their loss is felt more acutely.
But of course, grief and bereavement aren’t restricted to certain times of the year – they can affect different individuals at different moments, to varying degrees.
National Grief Awareness Week, which takes place 2 to 8 December 2024, is a chance for people, businesses and communities to acknowledge and develop a better understanding of the grieving process.
For employers in particular, it provides an opportunity to remove the stigma around the issue, encourage open and honest conversations and promote a supportive workplace culture.
Many organisations also provide either paid or unpaid bereavement leave in the event of the death of a close relative, recognising that a compassionate response is the right thing to do in the circumstances.
But while some employers have already put in place policies and procedures to support grieving employees, the fact is they are usually under no legal obligation to do so.
As things currently stand, except for parents on the death of a child under 18, there is no legal right to paid bereavement leave for employees in the UK – although that looks likely to change.
Under the new government’s recently announced Employment Rights Bill, employees should soon have a day-one right to paid bereavement leave. This will adapt the existing parental bereavement leave regime to give employees one week’s bereavement leave where the death is someone other than the individual’s child and regulations will specify which relatives this right applies to.
Employee rights
Introduced in 2020, parental bereavement leave provides the right to up to two weeks of paid leave to eligible employees at the same rate as statutory paternity pay.
In terms of leave, employees are entitled to take “reasonable” unpaid time off in relation to the death of a dependant – which includes a child, parent, spouse, civil partner or someone who lives in the same household – but the exact amount of leave given is at the employer’s discretion.
Rachel Hatton, an employment partner at law firm Knights, explains: “An employer is under no other legal obligation to support employees save that morally, they may wish to allow the employee as much time off as possible to come to terms with their loss, provide access to counselling services, maintain their pay and benefits (where feasible) and keep in regular contact with them, so they do not feel alienated from the business.”
Bereavement support
Quarter of workers feel unsupported after bereavement
But while there’s a consensus that employers should offer bereavement provisions, the issue of legislation is divisive. Lesley Cooper, founder and CEO of specialist business consultancy WorkingWell, doesn’t think employers should be forced by law to offer leave.
She says: “My honest feeling is that it should not have to be legislated – there is something culturally amiss if employees need the protection of the law to access time to grieve. It is true that work and the company of colleagues can be a welcome comfort and distraction in times of great sadness, but it is also true that it can be extraordinarily difficult to function well in times of severe emotional distress.
“Employers get the best out of their people when they see the human at work, not just the work they do, and with this in mind, there should be no need for legislation – freely allowing an employee non-legislated time to process and adjust to loss generates far more engagement and loyalty than evoking a legal entitlement.”
However, Richard Stone, managing director at PR agency Stone Junction, argues there is a need for employees to have legal bereavement rights.
“The current situation is so inadequate its almost comic. We are trying to solve the most difficult problem most people will ever go through, with the same amount of time off that you would normally take to attend a music festival,” he says.
“Grief is not something that can be rushed. People need time to process their emotions after losing a loved one, and the current laws in the UK simply don’t offer enough protection for that. Bereavement leave should be a legal right, not a luxury.”
Wide-ranging effects
Whatever provisions they have in place, employers must be mindful that the effects of a bereavement can be wide-ranging and can impact a bereft employee’s colleagues and the wider workplace, as well as the individual concerned.
Mark Wood, chairman of funeral concierge service provider Everest, says: “The grief that comes with bereavement is debilitating as people are forced to adjust to a new reality, and nobody can predict how they will respond to it. The physical and mental effects should not be underestimated.”
Highlighting the seven stages of grief – shock, denial or disbelief, frustration, depression, experiments, decision and integration – Caroline Taylor, clinical project lead at Onebright, UK outpatient mental healthcare provider, explains the process can be harder for some who find it difficult to move past a particular stage.
She says: “Grief and bereavement are ubiquitous. It is highly unlikely that someone will not be touched by sadness and the feeling of loss following the death of an important other during their life. The likelihood is that they have already, and more than once.
In the workplace it is important for everyone to understand the indicators of the ‘normal’ process of mourning and to look for when the process has become ‘stuck’, Taylor advises.
“Sadly, there is a proportion of people where bereavement persists, leading to difficulties in functioning and wellbeing. For their working life this can mean not wanting to work at all or working too much, or being unable to undertake certain tasks, for example,” she explains.
Managers mostly find it challenging to deal with a variety of emotions from those employees who have experienced bereavement but Cooper believes being able to deal with emotional responses is important.
“Everyone experiences bereavement and loss differently, so managers and HR policies need to be flexible and adaptable to reflect the individual needs of those suffering,” she says. “That means taking a flexible approach to how you lead and manage, being prepared for good days and bad days, being prepared for setbacks, changes in performance, bursting into tears during meetings, unexpectedly going home or sometimes not turning up.”
Cooper also advises employers to respect the needs of employees, who may need space to identify and establish their own boundaries; whether they want to be at home, hybrid to remain integrated in the office, or fully in the office to keep themselves busy and in routine.
She adds: “This understanding and flexibility offered to employees experiencing grief should be viewed as an investment in future performance.”
Policies and provisions
Many employers have a bereavement policy in place, but those that don’t are advised to implement one as soon as possible so that employees know where they stand if and when it’s needed.
Rena Magdani, national head of employment, pensions and immigration at UK law firm Freeths, says: “This provides guidance to managers and helps to ensure that decisions – for example, about payment for bereavement leave – are consistent, reducing the risk of discrimination claims.
“While payment terms might need to be fixed, employers and managers should be mindful that grief will affect different people in different ways and at different times, so some flexibility (eg to take additional unpaid leave) might be appropriate.”
Grace Pariser, HR and employment law consultant at Neathouse Partners, agrees that a flexible approach is the best one. She says: “Consider an adjusted return to work, such as a phased return or a temporary change in duties associated with their role. Respecting the wishes of the employee is vital.”
She also suggests a policy should detail if an individual will be paid, how long for and which individuals paid leave covers, for example, whether it includes immediate family such as parents, grandparents, siblings, children and partners or if it is extended to close friends and extended family.
Sarah Kerr, HR technical consultant at AdviserPlus, believes a modern bereavement policy should also be comprehensive and inclusive. She says: “In addition to covering leave for the death of immediate family members, it should account for specific situations like stillbirth, miscarriage, and parental bereavement. Some organisations even offer leave for the death of extended family members, close friends or even for pets, recognising the emotional impact such losses can have.
“Cultural and religious differences in how individuals process grief should also be acknowledged. Some employees may need time off for extended mourning periods or specific rituals. An inclusive bereavement policy should give managers discretion to make adjustments based on individual needs, rather than applying a rigid, one-size-fits-all approach. Ensuring that all employees feel supported, no matter their personal or cultural background.”
Training and support
There are two support components that employers should consider, which are emotional and practical, explains Wood.
“A good employer that is competent and caring will offer this already. It makes complete sense and is best practice,” he says.
Magdani also advises signposting staff to services and resources, whether that’s employer-provided access to employee assistance programmes or publicly-accessible sources of support.
Training and supporting managers is also important, says Magdani, suggesting this can include making sure that managers are aware of the relevant policies, helping them to be aware of the complexities of grief and to show compassion, help managers to deal with the initial response to an employee bereavement, make managers aware of different religious and cultural practices and help managers to continue providing support after any initial period of bereavement leave.
Stone says: “Bereavement support is an essential part of a compassionate workplace culture. It’s not just about offering time off; it’s about ensuring that employees feel emotionally supported during a difficult period.”
At Stone Junction, employees dealing with personal loss are offered flexible options. This might include paid bereavement leave, flexible working hours, or even additional wellbeing resources, depending on the individual’s needs.
Stone adds: “It’s simple: if employees are forced to return to work while still grieving, their productivity suffers, and the quality of their work declines. A clear, legally mandated bereavement policy creates a healthier work environment and reduces absenteeism over the long term. It’s also just the right the thing to do.”
Fintech payments company Cashflows offers flexible working and a number of different wellbeing resources – such as access to counselling via our private healthcare schemes – to employees going through a bereavement or difficult period.
Its chief people officer, June Ahi, says: “We’ve also found implementing activities like ‘lunch and learns’ around mental health to be very effective when it comes to raising awareness among our staff about navigating sensitive issues, such as bereavement.”
She adds: “People are the biggest asset to the business, so we want to ensure we support them both in and outside of the workplace.”
No quick fix
Employers should keep in mind that bereavement often has a long-term impact on those affected, with certain events or triggers making it harder for an individual to continue working as usual. This could include national days of celebration, such as Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Valentine’s Day or personal milestones, such as a loved one’s birthday or a wedding anniversary.
Employees should therefore be made aware that any workplace support on offer is continuously available and not just something that is provided at the time of the bereavement.
Simply checking in with staff regularly can also make all the difference and good line managers would already do this by nature, Wood insists.
“Death is the one thing we all experience and nobody talks about,” he says.
Stone believes clear communication about any policies is crucial. He adds: “By making employees aware of the support available, whether through onboarding materials or regular HR updates, we create a culture where no one feels isolated during a time of grief.
“Ultimately, showing that you genuinely care for your team during challenging times leads to a more resilient and loyal workforce.”
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