Guru is getting a real sense of déjà vu. Is it just a coincidence, or does Christmas happen every year? Yours Truly noticed this repeating trend several years ago and, after some extensive research, carried out by 'top boffins', he can exclusively reveal that it has indeed been happening every year for quite some time now.
Quite possibly it has happened enough times to be represented by the delusional graphics team of Newsnight as enough Santas to stretch from here to the moon in a London bus being pulled along by reindeer.
It seems that 2008 has been a year of uncanny happenings all over the place, not least Chez Guru, where Mrs Guru has been repeating herself for decades - and not just in a cucumber kind of way.
One of her mantras is to 'make do and mend' and she loves to re-use old pots and pans, plastic containers and clothes - something she spookily has in common with the nation's head of state, old QEII herself. For in these straitened times, HRH is setting an example to all her subjects by recycling her dresses and actually rewearing some of her clothes, rather that packing them off to some museum after the first outing. Mrs Guru and the Queen also share a love of keeping mountains of hats, bags and shoes... just in case.
Yours Truly settles for one pair of walking boots and one pair of shiny shoes for those hard-to-avoid industry get togethers.
Some of the Queen's costumes border on the insane bearing in mind the century we're in. After all, Guru, despite the dangers to the tonsorially challenged of going out without a titfer, dispensed with the pillbox hat years ago, favouring a rich, no-hair tonic of lard and dubbin to keep him warm in these cold winter months. Much of this is down to his semi-secret identity and, in a bout of uncanniness not seen since last December, that other secret squirrel of a fox in sheep's clothing, Father Christmas, is also out and about this month.
However, unlike Guru, but just like the Queen (spookily), it seems Santa is a one-man job creation scheme each winter, with an army of helpers at his disposal who all nod deferentially and only tell him what he wants to hear, bowing and scraping and generally being subservient. But that's not the only similarity between Santa and our monarch as they clearly share a love of silly hats and even sillier modes of transport.
So in the week of the Queen's Speech - the day when Her Maj is w